Consider the essential moral question, Is what I am about to do in keeping with my values, ethics or sense of meaning? I’ve argued that the answer to this query comes to us first as a felt sense of “rightness” or “wrongness,” and only afterward do we explain to ourselves why this might be so…. Read more »
Posts Categorized: Social intelligence
Civility at Work
“How do you handle someone who is being obnoxious?” That was a question put to me recently when I talked to a group having their annual Civility Awareness day at the University of Massachusetts Medical Center at Worcester. We explored how best to encourage civility – which goes beyond mere politeness. The UMass credo on… Read more »
Three Kinds of Empathy: Cognitive, Emotional, Compassionate
Being cool in crisis seems essential for our being able to think clearly. But what if keeping cool makes you too cold to care? In other words, must we sacrifice empathy to stay calm? That’s the dilemma facing those who are preparing top teams to handle the next Katrina-like catastrophe we might face. Which gets… Read more »
Wired to Connect
As every author knows, books never really end – you just stop writing them at some point. This is especially true for books like mine, which take a science journalist’s approach to major new fields of discovery. The research and its applications that I wrote about in <em>Emotional Intelligence</em>, <em>Social Intelligence</em> and my other books… Read more »
Making Sense of Our Lives
When you were young, which of these did you feel more often: No matter what I do, my parents love me. I can’t seem to please my parents, no matter what I do. My parents don’t really notice me. The answers to such questions reveal more than about our childhood: they also tend to predict… Read more »
From the Basement to the Balcony: Your Brain in an Emergency
I spoke recently with a psychologist who advises teams handling emergencies, including catastrophes like hurricanes. It occurred to me that a basic bit of neuroscience should adds a crucial piece in preparing for catastrophe, especially for those coordinating the response, as well as those on the front lines. The plans for emergency, he pointed out,… Read more »
SEND: Cooling the Flame
Poor Michael Brown. During the darkest days of the Hurricane Katrina debacle, Brown, then director of FEMA, the agency that so badly bungled the rescue efforts, sent this email: “Are you proud of me? Can I quit now? Can I go home?” Emails can come back to haunt us – any of us. Few among… Read more »
The Trouble with IQ
I’ve just spoken to a friend who tells me that the tech company he works for, one of the world’s most well-known brand names, uses IQ or its surrogates – SAT, GMAT, GPA scores and the like – as critical requirement for employment – even if they were scores from many years ago. Basically, they… Read more »
Flame First, Think Later: New Clues to E-mail Misbehavior
Jett Lucas, a 14-year-old friend, tells me the kids in his middle school send one other a steady stream of instant messages through the day. But there’s a problem. “Kids will say things to each other in their messages that are too embarrassing to say in person,” Jett tells me. “Then when they actually meet… Read more »
Emotional Contagion and Customer Satisfaction
“I had an accountant who used to make me crazy,” a friend tells me. “So I switched to one who always makes me feel fine, no matter what we’re talking about.” That we gravitate to people who we enjoy being with is obvious. When it comes to the business world, cranky store clerks drive away… Read more »